Tuesday 2 May 2017

THE UGLY TRUTH OF BEAUTY.


"We have probably all been plagued by body image."

They say beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. So why is it I feel the constant need to lose weight, the urge to keep up with trends and quite frankly blend in. It's 2017 and women are strong and independent, yet this urge of weakness overtakes me and I constantly feel compelled to keep up. Each and every beauty product I buy is an attempt at feeling beautiful.

At one stage or another, we have probably all been plagued by body image. Sometimes it's caused by self-doubt and other times it caused by ugly words and ignorant people. For some of us, it only affects us from time to time and for the rest of us it eats us up.


But can we ever really learn to accept ourselves? One simple answer. YES. If you want to and I mean only if you really really want to. (God that sounded like a lyrics from a 90's spice girl song). Never ever, did I dream I would feel somewhat comfortable standing in front of a camera and actually posting, for some this is natural and they look effortlessly beautiful, purely just because they are comfortable with themselves. For me, I would look like Chandelier from Friends, you know the series where he would try and smile in front of a camera and end up looking like a psychopath? Yup that's me, but a short and chubby version.


"I've just started accepting more and more, that I am who I am. All 5ft 3 inches of me, stretch marks, saggy skin and all"

But now, out of nowhere, I've just started accepting more and more, that I am who I am. All 5ft 3 inches of me, stretch marks, saggy skin and all. Some people say it comes with age and I mean to some extent, the older we get the more we learn and the less we care. But in all honesty, to really feel more comfortable in yourself, I believe we must push ourselves so far out of our comfort zone so that we can completely lose sight of what it is that makes us comfortable anymore.


Don't get me wrong, it doesn't happen overnight and it is certainly something I work at every single day but for the most part I am ok with not being stick thin and knowing that some days it is ok to eat a pack of biscuits, all six packets of crisps from a multipack and a Chinese. I've made a vow to not obsess over what I eat and the way I look and sure, from time to time I do but, I'm learning that it is not the end of the world if my jeans are so tight they cut off circulation.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, let's all try and obsess less, live more and quit sweating the small stuff. Sometimes it's ok to feel down in yourself, sometimes it's ok to make jokes at your own expense but it is also ok to feel good about yourself and whether that means going Au Naturale, or If it means covering your face in makeup then so be it. I am so done with caring if people think I wear too much makeup and I am so done with worrying what people think of me, people who love you will love you for you, flaws and all.


So here's to self-loveself-worth, and lots of selfies.

Bag- Tidebuy/Boots-F&F 


*affiliate links are used in this post.
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57 comments

  1. I absolutely love this post. I couldn't agree more we spend so much of our time trying to fit in that we forget what's really important. Your are beautiful though!

    Tania || www.taniaalexandraribeiro.com

    xxxx

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    1. Thank you hun. I'm so glad you enjoyed it! Thank you, I know I beat myself up with the way I look and chances are I probably always will but trying to accept it and pushing myself helps me

      xx

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  2. Love this post very much.. Thank you so much for sharing this without.. I agree with everything you said.. People worry to much about what others may think, what matters is what you think.. In nowadays people are more into physical and what they look like, people has become so materialistic, they forget about the important things in life..they actually forget to live.. live, love,laugh I always say!You are beautiful no matter what!

    www.faelasbeauty.com

    Love from Rafaela xx

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    1. Thank you hun. I'm really glad you enjoyed it. I won't lie I care a lot about what I look like. Not because I'm vain but because I'm insecure, I believe to a certain extent we can't control it but sometimes we do need to try see the other side to life xx

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  3. I relate 100%, except it took a lot of therapy and hard work for me to even consider accepting myself. For me, self image is my biggest issue and I have a lot of issues so that's saying something! Did you know that in drug and alcohol addiction the root cause is also self image? Unfortunately, despite many of us getting wiser with age, it's not just a young person issue to have a misguided self image. Our self image is actually developed from the day we are born and is "fully cooked" by 7 years of age. Anything that happens after then is just icing on the cake but to undo the ill-formed self image is a battle for the rest of your life - for some more than others.
    I believe the more we discuss this, out in the open, without a filter, the better it will be for upcoming generations. If everyone know how self image damaged or controlled a person, and were aware that by 7ys old the damage is done, I'd like to think people would conduct themselves quite different around children.

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    1. Oh yes of course, it really is different for everyone. This is definitely a lighthearted version of what I do feel. I know its something that everyone experiences and literally we all experience it in different ways. Yes I also really believe that it can happen from a young age and more than anything in my life all I try to do is build my daughter up and make her feel confident and beautiful and listened to. I always always try to act confident around her even though she is 11 months I want her to grow up and see that I'm confident as well. It may sound silly but it is one thing I want for her more than anything in the world.

      xx

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  4. I love this post! I definitely can relate. It's so easy to be hard on myself.
    I've noticed I'm much harder on my appearance when I'm struggling at work or very stressed out. It's taken many years to just realize this, and I'm working very hard to get rid of negative thoughts.
    I love that you've been posting more pics of you. You're so elegant and beautiful. Also, it feels as though I'm actually there in the moment with you because there's such a sense of honesty in your pics. Not sure if that makes sense, but you are so inspiring and I thank you for this post!

    Jenn │ Beauty by Jellybean

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    1. Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it.

      It really is isn't it? Yeah, I can relate to that, I feel like there will always be times I'm hard on myself but for the most part I am trying to be a much more confident version of myself.

      and that is one of the biggest compliments ever, so so so kind! Thank you so much, I can't even thank you enough xx

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  5. Firstly I absolutely love your bag, and secondly I love this post! Completely agree with every word, so happy to hear you're feeling more confident in yourself, you look amazing!

    Jodie / jodiemelissa.com

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    1. Thank you so much gorgeous! I'm so glad you enjoyed it.

      Thanks again xx

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  6. Oh wow Stacey, this post is absolutely incredible. Your content is so well put together & these photos of you are absolutely beautiful!!!!!

    Elley Mae | http://elleymae.com

    Ps - lost for words.. In love!

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    1. Thank you so much lovely. Thats really kind to say and as always that is a massive compliment coming from you xx

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  7. Loved this post so much my lovely. I seriously couldn't relate to it anymore if I tried!!!! Also I love your outfit, you look absolutley STUNNING Girl xxx Georgie - As You Wish UK xxxx

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    1. Thank you hun. I'm glad I'm not the only one. I'm a little obsessed with this dress at the moment and thank you so so much gorgeous xx

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  8. I bloody LOVED this read. I can relate to your feelings so much and passion you put into writing this post. I love reading posts like this - let alone write them. They get so much off your shoulders it makes you feel like a new women again. However, you look fabulous my babe and as long as Robbie likes you for you then that's all that matters! (I am hoping I got his name correct!!)

    ox Taylor Jane

    www.taylorjane.co.uk

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    1. Thank you gorgeous. I'm glad you can see how much passion goes into it. Thank you gorgeous haha and yes Robbie is correct! xx

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  9. This is a really lovely post. I personally am in two minds about body image. On one hand I do care about how I look but I tend to dress and do my make-up how I want to not because I want to look good.

    http://ohduckydarling.com

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    1. Thanks hun glad you enjoyed. Yes I feel like now I do whatever I want to make me feel good and thats all that matters xx

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  12. Babe this was such an inspiring post! THANKS SO MUCH!

    xx Lisa | lisaautumn.com

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    1. Thank you so much lovely! I'm glad you enjoyed it xx

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  13. Loved this post so much it was so encouraging will definitely bookmark it. Thankyou!

    Taslyn| www.hiddenbeau-t.co.uk

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    1. Thank you so much hun! I'm really glad you enjoyed it xx

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  14. I LOVE this post you beautiful thing, it so hits the nail on the head. I am so critical of myself sometimes and can be really hard on myself but as I get older I am finding it easier to sometimes just take a chill and look at the positives. I completely agree with you about pushing ourselves so far out of our comfort zones that we almost lose sight of who we really are. Massive fan of this post lovely!! Amazing content and beautiful photos as always!! xxxx

    Tash | natashatodd.co.uk

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    1. Thank you so much lovely. Yes I think everyone is really hard on themselves and it really is so hard to just get on with it some times but I think if we do push ourselves and force ourselves sometimes maybe just sometimes we can try and believe in ourselves more! Thank you gorgeous xx

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  15. I LOVE this post. And it's something that I've definitely needed to read this week! You hit the nail on the head and it's just so refreshing to read! X

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    1. Thank you so much lovely! I'm glad I got it up just in time for you! xx

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  16. Such an amazing post Stacey and you look stunning and completely comfortable in your own skin which is just the best. Loved this!

    The Makeup Directory

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    1. Thank you so much! I feel so much more comfortable in my skin these days. Don't get me wrong I have my days but I'm in a much better place with myself these days x

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  17. This was so inspiring to read, thank you. I find body confidence so difficult and I have always struggled, hopefully one day I will get there. You look amazing by the way!

    Alice | alicemaysnell

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    1. Awww Thank you so much. I think it's something we all struggle with and it kind of always stays with us but I never ever thought I would say that I am so much more comfortable with myself x

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  18. This is such a perfect post I love it! You look beautiful in your photos they're so stunning and your words mean so much. It's so nice to hear and so so true. I've been trying to learn to be comfortable in my own skin too lately and I'm sure lots of other people need this little bit of encouragement to do the same! It's hard not to get caught up on the word 'beauty' and start thinking your not good enough.

    Ellie x

    www.elliesbitsofbeauty.wordpress.com

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    1. Thank you so much lovely. Aww that is incredibly kind! Yea I wanted to address it but keep it lighthearted and positive and encouraging. I really hope it helps you in some way xx

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  19. Love love love this post 💕 I really struggle with self confidence which isn't great as a Ballroom dancer!! I could do with all of the confidence I can get. Very well written post that I think screams out what a lot of people are thinking! (And your photos are stunning) xx

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    1. Thank you so much! I'm so glad you enjoyed it . I feel like most of us do struggle and its perfectly ok. Yes I can imagine it must be really hard when you do something like that but your doing amazing just by getting up and doing it anyway!

      xx

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  20. Yes exactly right! I always say, it's only when you completely 100% don't care what others think of you that you are truly free. And that's a wonderful feeling :)

    Di from Max The Unicorn

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    1. Yes thats exactly it. I'm not 100% free yet but I hope to be one day! xx

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  21. I love this post so much, it is so beautifully written! You are beautiful inside and out. I have always struggled with body image and people's short, sometimes joking comments used to always affect me, but I am getting better at being positive about myself. It's just about creating a positive mindset, which can be so hard!

    Laura || www.thelifeoflaura.com.au xx

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    1. Thank you so much lovely! I'm really glad you enjoyed it and like the style I've written it in. I spend quite some time trying to get everything together and sound right. God people sometimes don't realise those little "jokes" can really break someone! You are so beautiful ,insane and out but yes its all about creating a positive mindset which is really difficult but you can do it. You are already such a positive soul! xx

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  22. This is such a great post! I really love the message behind this. I think it's especially hard for anyone that's wrapped up in the beauty community. It's so easy to compare yourself to other people or feel as if your the only one lagging behind. We always focus on posting the best aspects of life on social media and it's so easy to get caught up in that!
    -Stephanie | www.nudelipdairies.com

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    1. It really is hard isn't it. Yes comparison is the thief of joy! I try to not get to caught up in it all anymore xx

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  23. What an inspirational post! I loved reading it! I'm definitely not a photogenic person but I've grown comfortably enough to just laugh about bad photos rather than obsess over all the little imperfections :)

    x Helen http://www.seaandstyle.com/blog/

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    1. Thank you so much, I'm glad you enjoyed it. I'm not at all but I'm exactly the same I'm trying to worry less and laugh more xx

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  24. Love "obsess less, live more"! So true, thanks for sharing this.

    http://www.myclusterofthoughts.com/

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    1. Haha thank you lovely! your more than welcome xx

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  25. This was an incredibly enlightening post; you're stunning! I sometimes struggle with my self confidence and this has made me rethink a lot of things. x
    Lots of love,
    Marina Rosie xx
    http://marinawriteslife.blogspot.fr/

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    1. Thank you lovely! I'm really glad you've enjoyed this post!

      xx

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  26. Very inspirational, I'm constantly hating my body because of what pregnancy & child birth did to it but then the rest of the time I'm like, do I really care? I carried a baby and got the best gift I could ever have imagined! I hated my body before I was pregnant too but now it's changed, I really don't know why and I'll probably feel the same about how it is now if it changes again. Definitely just need to learn to love yourself how you are x

    Gemma Louise

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  27. This is such a positive and enlightening post! I need to read more like this!! We don't give ourselves enough credit for the things we love about ourselves and we should praise ourselves more!! I'm starting to love my body and feel comfortable in it finally! Looking forward to reading more posts! Also, loving this outfit!! xx

    Robyn xo
    www.littlebobloves.o.uk

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  28. Amen sister! Stacey, you are such a beautiful person inside out, I so appreciate you sharing your candid thoughts with us. This was such an inspirational post to read, don't you ever doubt yourself! Hugs xx


    Naya // www.partyparrotblog.com

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  29. Aw Stacey this is such a good post and has come at the perfect time for me. I go on holiday in 2 weeks and no joke I have been actually anxious about getting in a bikini! So silly because I won't know anyone there and Chris knows what I look like but just the thought of not having a perfect stomach plays on my mind! But reading this has made me realise not to be so stupid and to just think oh f*** it! Thanks hun :) You look beautiful in these pictures, I love your dress! xx

    Laura | www.mylauralife.co.uk

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  30. Lovely post Stacey, you are beautiful inside and out and you and Robbie have the most amazing daughter who thrives on your energy and positivity so just carry on doing what you are doing xx

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  31. Being comfortable in our own skin is such an underestimated skill. As females we are so hard on ourselves because there isn't a day when we aren't shown what we are suppose to look like and what mold we are meant to fit in. I definitely went through that phase where I hated my body but now I feel like I do finally feel comfortable in my own skin. At times i may be bloated and I have love handles and when I sit down my rolls bunch up like nobodies business but I feel like there is so much more to life then our exterior - we could look like a victoria's secret model but that doesn't mean we automatically have a wonderful life. And as women and humans really our bodies our going to change. They are going to wrinkle, sag, we will gain and lose weight repeatedly but our worlds and lives don't revolve around that. And often those who we think look like a million bucks are filled with insecurities.

    www.themakeupaficionado.com

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  32. Lovely post. Body insecurities are horrible and very difficult to take control of. I'm pregnant currently and even though I'm excited for the baby, I can't help looking in the mirror and feeling disgusting and thinking that I'll never have the body I want again. Seems so silly when you think about it, but it's crazy how much it all gets in your head!

    Jaynie Shannon | Beauty & Lifestyle

    xx

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  33. I love this post and your honesty. Sometimes I do obsess but lately I noticed that I don't care as much as I used to. I still take care of what I eat during the day but on the Weekends I eat what I want.
    Lots of love, Desi (stunnydesi_loves on IG)

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  34. I love this post so much, it's so true and your honesty is inspiring! It's taken me so long to accept my body and be confident in myself but since doing so I'm so much happier.
    Love Jasmin (Healthy Twenties) xxx

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